July 05, 2006
I was entrusted to the care of nuns, by the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) as a 3 year old charged and sentenced up to the age of sixteen. What crime had I been charged with, illegitimacy. What price did I have to pay for the whole of my life. I was denied any contact with every member of my family. The place and country of my birth, so in effect Ireland made me and many others orphans. No birth or christening certificates.
When you take away the rights of a child to their very own name and give them the number SS, that is what I am down as on the school rule book, then you can begin to wonder what respect and treatment can be melted out. I was then sent to people in England that were not married or related to me, these people abused me so badly that, seven weeks later I was taken into care in England, again by the NSPCC, but this time I was to be detained till I was 18 years of age. Who did the checks on people that I was entrusted to… nobody then and nobody now cares? So to take away a child’s basic rights of just your name, this is where the first crime was committed. Anything that followed after this was just the norm. We are talking about all this happing after the second world war, where people had fought and died for the liberation of people. Some of them died in vain, because their children were then incarcerated in hellholes in Ireland, England, Australia and Canada. To so-called Religious orders. Wherever children around the world were put into the so called care of the Religious orders they have left their rotten calling card. We all now know that it happened – not to everyone, but for it to happen to one child is bad, but for it to happen to so many children, decade after decade is diabolical.
Why do I write this letter. This is my reason. I went looking for my birth certificate, after I was informed that the birth certificate, I was given in 1969 did not belong to me. So I wanted to know what my name was, and where I was born, so I could get a passport. I did a lot of research here in England, got all my files, from the many places I was in as a child, and no birth certificate was to be found. The questions had been asked many times, and years, after I was brought to England. I then had to go to Ireland in 2000. This is where I first heard about the child abuse commission. I was encouraged to put my name down for it. This I did. I was only one of 7 people. I then had to do a lot more research, because if I was going to give evidence, I did not want anyone to dispute me. So year after year since 2000, I have been waiting to go to the child abuse commission, and wondering if I would ever get called. Well finally in September 2005 I got called. But what a disappointment! I was given an interview that lasted about one and a half hours, where nothing was written down or recorded, and without any legal representation. So again I dug up my past that I had put behind me a long time ago, my nightmares and fears like so many others that was looking for the whole sorry mess of our childhood to go down for posterity
I have now been informed that the industrial school I was in, along with 36 other Industrial schools, will not have a public hearing. No explanation on who gave the religious the right to have children sent into the Magdalene laundries or mental hospitals for the whole of their live and shipped around the world.
I want to go away and cry, for the loss of my childhood when I was a child.
But tears won’t come this I know.
Because I buried my nightmares away in my soul.
Now I try to remember my past, for the truth to come out and be told at last.
But the anger I feel at the deceit of today, they are still trying to cover up, the pain won’t go away.
The pain that i feel at uncovering my past, has left me so angry, that i now find it hard to laugh.
My mind as a child, was locked up in pain, to cry before others was my shame. My childhood was stolen, and taken from me, who can ever give it back to me..